Clone Call of the Calories

Aliens are invading. They spawn in a field near a car park, using cloned bodies of local youths. For a short while, after spawning, they are bullet proof. Local gangs challenge them, joining together at different spawn points across the city. They are always defeated.

We organise a meeting. Lots of people turn up, including president Obama and reporters, who we try to keep out. There’s no door, only a curtain. We tell people it’s a sci-fi convention. They see through the ruse and come in anyway.
We are disorganised. People sit at small individual desks arranged randomly and talk over one another. Eventually order emerges. I am presented with a certificate, recognising my efforts, giving me a military rank and permitting me to kill aliens. It has someone else’s name on, that has been crossed out. My name is scrawled below. I am not happy about this.

We dance, flocking like birds in reaction to each other’s moves, we flow around the room. It is a thing of beauty.

We discuss strategy, including placing those cloned in the spawn fields, armed, and in such a position that they can gun down the aliens once they lose invulnerability.

I leave the room, and walking down a corridor, I meet a group of alien clones. They seem nice enough, but their behaviour betrays them. I follow them to a bar, talking. I discover a weakness. They love sugary, calorific things. They gulp down fizzy drinks and sugary sauces. Some ask where they can find more, and follow my direction to a local curry house.

I meet some of my allies. I signal that I am with aliens. We take them down a steep, stepped corridor to the quayside. Some more aliens turn back, unable to resist the call of the calories.

I am at the back. As I enter the quay and cross the road, I see a knife. I stuff it into my hoodie.

The clones are talking to the originals. Sat at a table, one of the originals shout to me, that they have ‘discovered how to Liver together’ he makes another reference to liver. I realise that is a weak point. I stab the nearest alien in the liver. He looks surprised, and dies. They are not the immortals they thought themselves. I dispatch as many as quickly as I can.

It is over. Back in our room we celebrate our victory. Some clones survived, and this makes me nervous.

I am in a hospital pleading for help, I have just seen a clone, and I’m convinced he will kill me. No one listens. Not nurses or doctors. I find an unqualified doctor dressed in red. She listens and tries to help.



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