The New Oldham Game


I am visiting Oldham. It has changed beyond recognition. Steampunks on stilts and many street performers, tourists wandering into the path of oncoming vehicles.

I fall in with a group of lads. I follow them to a house. Someone inside is presenting a QVC channel type show about counselling. I feel like I’m intruding and leave.

I’m trying to find a bus stop to Manchester. The numbers have all changed. Drunk painter and decorators, in white dungarees dance in a circle at a road junction. A living, drunk roundabout.

I’m playing a computer game. I’m defeating a scientist who’s trying to inject me with something. It tells me I have the hugest score ever.

I replay the level with my feet. I still win.

I’m wandering with Luke Skywalker, trying to find our way back into the game. We run up steps by a building illuminated with a giant crossword.

What do you think?